formerly Kamera To My Eye

29 April 2008

Holy Frack


So, in the past few days things have gone from fine to good to great to awesome to "shit, things are fucking awesome!"

I am so alive, and so happy. I've been so confused and unsure about so many things--selfishly and stubbornly I've kept myself from enjoying things, doing things, thinking things and being different shades of myself. It's amazing what a few little tidbits of good news and conversation can do to a man when he feels slightly contemplative about matters.

This past weekend was without a doubt one of the best I've had in a long time. Went up to Lexington on Friday night to ice skate with Kira, Seth and Linds and had a blast--it's been six years since I've done that--then spent the rest of the night chatting at Seth's house then ending up at Kira's dorm at Transylvania with Boyd and Linds and drank a bit and enjoyed the evening highly! I have to make a rather large admission; Kira has not one, but two macs, an iMac and a Macbook, and after spending a bit really checking them out I really want one; honestly I don't know why, but they just have a nice feel to them. I think I would soley use it for music and video and I think that's just fine. Until Zune can be used on macs I think I'll hold out. Camping Saturday night was awesome; we just spent the whole evening looking over Berea and Richmond and listened to the radio via my Zune. Dined on Cheez-Its and Jones root beer (fucking amazing) and stayed until 3pm Sunday.

Registered for classes; good news is I've got Comparative Vertebrate Anatomy, Botany and Parasitology (which was closesd, but Rosen def. let me in cause I'm awesome) but Senior Seminar is up in the air--maybe until Spring. Fuck it.

Weekend looks awesome; bonfire Friday with Amy, Linds, Boyd, Seth, Lena and Kira

To celebrate a great weekend and week (so far) here's an awesome new tune:

M.I.A. - Paper Planes (my new favorite song)

24 April 2008

How fast can you type?

Pretty interesting to see how much I could actually type--and wow, I'm impressed.

69 words

Speedtest

14 April 2008

The Avett Brothers - The Weight of Lies



The weight of lies will bring you down
And follow you to every town
'cause, nothing happens here
That doesn't happen there

So when you run, make sure you run
To something, and not away from
'cause lies don't need an aeroplane
To chase you down

The Avett Brothers - The Weight of Lies

13 April 2008

New Chapter


So, a new day it is. A new chapter has started, I feel, and I'm oddly glad to be done with the last portion of my life. Oddly I feel excited to start living fully and not confined to another person for awhile. Do what I want, when I want, and how I want.

Friday was a confusing day, a very confusing day. Started off well enough--8am Psych was a breeze, no Buddhism, Physics at 1pm, and Hiking was spent creating do-it-yourself burners from tuna cans, parafin and cardboard. Quick and easy day. Yet, that wasn't all; had a final spat with my significant other, and called it quits.

I feel like it's a definite this time and not anything to take lightly. I don't feel like there is a future there at all and for that reason I can't even muster enough sadness, remorse or regret to make myself feel like I just came out of a long, six year relationship. I just feel emptier, and a little less solid. I don't have my usual strategy to take on the day and I don't have my habits to fall back on--we are creatures of habit and when we lose something that was integral to those habits it is hard to not feel lost and confused and a little disoriented.

Disoriented, that is certainly how I feel. Yet, I feel optimistic about the future. Just finish out this semester and then I'll be heading to Vanderbilt University to do some research this summer with Dr. Billy G. Hudson. I am very excited and anxious for this opportunity; I know I can do it and I know I'll be fine there, but it's a big university and this research is going to be intensive and very much real world research. I've got to prepare, how will I do that? By reading a metric ton of published papers and knowing them quite well.

I just watched Battlestar Galactica: The Miniseries this weekend with Jeffrey and Johnny and I am completely blown away by this show! It is phenomenal--highly suggested to any sci-fi fan, and any drama fan. It will certainly transcend those who have a sci-fi-aversion. It is superb. I couldn't wait for the season 1 first disc to come in netflix so I thought I'd try the Amazon Unbox download service while I was at it--whole first season for $20. Not bad. It just finished downloading, so I shall be watching that in just a few moments.

Things are pretty good I must say, just have to get my academics in full gear, my social life tweaked, and get my head to stop spinning long enough so I don't miss the next road sign.

Bon Iver - re: Stacks

10 April 2008

Flickr

This is a test post from flickr, a fancy photo sharing thing.

05 April 2008

Memory Lane via MP3


So, I'm sitting here listening to some old sappy songs about love and love lost, and all the melancholic feelings it invariable inspires, and this little Irish chap I'm listening never has let me down.

Why? Well, I'll tell you, because that's how I am feeling tonight; it's quite particularly something tonight. Don't know why, don't really care, all I know is I'm feeling a little down and these are a few Damien Rice songs that get me feeling quite alright about my state. Enjoy.

Damien Rice - Amie
(O)
Damien Rice - Delicate (O)
Damien Rice - Cannonball (O)

I bought Children of Men, Syriana, and Serenity yesterday at a crappy consignment shop all for $18, and yes I was (am) quite happy. Absolutely loved Children of Men, but never got to finish/really watch Syriana and that's a movie that really demands attention, and of course I love Firefly so by default I love the movie, Serenity.

Also, enjoy this new tune by the Evangelicals.
Evangelicals - Skeleton Man (The Evening Descends)

Time to go to bed. Classes start back Monday. I am certainly well-rested and ready for them.

01 April 2008

Big Hard Sun, Beating Down On Me

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So, I finally got around to watching Into the Wild and I have to say it is one of the most fascinating and involving films I've ever seen. I had wanted to watch it when it first came out in theaters but with a full class schedule at Berea as a science major, that says otherwise. So, I put it into my Netflix queue on a whim and not a few days later a friend of mine mentioned I would love it. I was pretty confident I was going to enjoy the movie. I knew only vague bits about the story of Christopher McCandless, and ultimately I had no real idea what was going to happen in the film.

I loved the screenplay, certainly all credit is to be given to Sean Penn for taking this story from John Krakauer's book and turning it into a story of not what happens to Chris when he makes it to Alaska, but rather what happens to him along the way and ultimately the fragility and indelible sanctity of the relationships we form during our lives. The ability for us to spend entire lives with someone and only finally realize that you can never understand each other and the other rarer and more special relationships involving those who understand us within a breaths leaving us and how an entire existence of someone can be so easily transduced to someone we hardly know and just met. That is exactly what this film evokes among other things. Including the fragility of relationships is the undeniable beauty and draw some of us feel towards the Great Outdoors.

I myself have felt that call, the call of the simple--of the free and unorganized. I felt a great urge and to a great extent still do, to hike the Appalachian Trail. The thought of leaving behind my cellphone, my laptop, my Zune, my Xbox and my lightbulbs seemed to draw me based on the hopes of a sort of cleansing it would create. To lose all those attachments, the obsessions we create based on nothing more than our own sedentary lifestyles at times. Truly, this film has inspired me moreso, and has also redirected these desires towards the great Northwest. Alaska always seemed desirable, but moreso now. I'd have to go in late spring/early summer. To brave the cold on first trek would be very unwise. I hope to one day. To be able to drop all I am doing and head there would be the greatest experience I could ever hope to accomplish. I would love to visit the site of the Magic Bus. I feel as if McCandless has become a sort of heroic figure in my eyes--much against (I'm sure) his intentions. He embodies what I believe we all on some level hope to do; drop our attachments, our silly obligations, drop the mold that we feel so strongly about filling and head out into the woods. Where else could it be simpler I ask? I've spent my share of camping in the forests of Appalachia.

I know as well as anyone that its not some simple, easy going life. There is struggle. Food is not readily available like a fridge or pantry, and thus you must work for your nourishment and your shelter. Taking care of your equipment can mean the difference between a good time, an annoying time and a nearly fatal experience. However, the work and the struggle of spending great lengths of time in the wild could only be an experience that would relax the mind and calm oneself. As a student of Buddhism, this feeling is even more so true. To finally attain the understanding to leave behind one's fetters and head into the unknown and ultimately realize the great things there are to know--the things you can not learn from a textbook or a classroom or a movie or from sitting comfortably in your home--seems undeniable fascinating and I hope I can one day--soon--spend only a little while trying to figure myself out in the wild.

I've ordered Krakauer's book and hope to start reading it very soon.


clip of McCandless' discovery of his famed 'Magic Bus'

Enjoy these amazing Eddie Vedder tunes from the soundtrack:
Eddie Vedder - Guaranteed
Eddie Vedder - Hard Sun

Here's to hearing your call of the wild.